Wednesday, January 15

How To Make Big $$$ Art!!

Heh, heh...

So I have this, well, ordinary painting see? And what it needed was to be magically transformed into art. So here's the first secret, ready?  Our brains are hard wired to find patterns, order, and the meaning within.Which means if you take a frame and drop it over anything, well, our eyes tell our minds to hunt for meaning inside the perimeters. Sooooo

(1) First whatcha gotta do is put a frame around that painting and hang it in a setting that radiates… MONEY! So what you've got is both the frame that makes people figure that there's meaning inside, and when you plop it into a posh set it whispers to the viewer that the buyer who framed that image has BUCKS! Now that says art, right? I mean when somebody who can buy anything decides to frame then display this image, well see that's an offstage authority who's paid a large price tag so this's gotta't be important art, huh?

(2) Now, following that reasoning, let's crank up the wealth of the buyers because of the second secret… "perception is reality!" Here the framers hung the thing in a top corporation's board room. Now these members have fiduciary responsibility for the company's owners. They could be jailed if they waste owner money. So they're not allowed to buy cheap crap. Look at the painting now where the strategists and governance of this corporation will look at it as they manage their billion dollar budgets. This image's not just worth money… Hey, if those people buy it… it's worth [b]piles[/b] of money!

(3) But… but… what do those board room denizens frame and hang in their own richy-rich homes, huh? Why this obviously elegant painting that incidentally compliments the palette with which the top shelf designers have encased this room. That painting's so valuable that the millionaire owners created a room around it. Whoa!

(4) But. if the lower floors in number 3 might be owned by influentials, then finding it hung by the owner of a penthouse overlooking the finest city view must mean that home's only painting's got to have a price as nose-bleed high up as the penthouse itself. This MUST be one valuable creation from a super-distinguished artist, right?

(5) An artist that's so important (and expensive) that he's likely to hang in the waiting room of Gotham's most exclusive cosmetic surgical practice… a room that's got to reflect both the taste of the surgeons and the expectations of their patients.

Wuddauya think? If you frame and hang it just right… Is it art? I'm thinking YEAH BABY!  That sucker's a million dollar find. Huh? And that's it. Just frame your work and place it in breathtakingly wealthy settings. Creating the perception of not just art but reeeeeeely, reeeeeely, reeeeeeely valuable stuff. Perception's reality!

No need to thank me, just follow these simple rules then send along one or two percent of your explosively profitable sales, K?  

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