Deer-Ness

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So a guy says, "Yo, this thing's not a photograph, Ted. I don't know wudda-hell-itiz, but it ain't no photo."

Wrong! If it's not a photograph, um, wudda-hell-izzit? See this image exists. It came from my camera. This deer was standing on the back porch of a mountain cabin up in Lake Harmony. It was chewing on a cracker and staring at me through the back door window. And I took its picture with a wide angle lens - standing that close.

But then I figured, wait. Everybody's got some kinda picture of a deer. I mean how rare are the things? But then I says to myself... "Self, what's a deer? I mean what is the essence of deerness?" Now you may wonder why I talk to me. Passing right by that... I looked to see if I could isolate that deer essence. You know, leave just enough so that if I took anymore away – POOF! –No deer.

And here it is... it shows what deers have, and other things lack. Why... it's... it's... an ontological miracle. Right? Um, oh yeah, and it's still a photograph... I just kind of shoveled stuff off of the photo plane to reveal that cracker eating deer. If you know what I'm saying here?